True love is transcendental. Without recognition of the formless within yourself, there can be no true transcendental love. If you cannot recognize the formless in yourself, you cannot recognize yourself in the other. The recognition of the other as yourself in essence – not the form – is true love. The pull towards the other is an attempt to find wholeness, completeness, fulfillment through the opposite polarity, in an attempt to find the Oneness. That lies at the basis of the attraction. It’s to do with form, because on the level of form you are not whole – you are one half of the whole. One half of humanity is male, one half is female, roughly. If personal love is all that there is, then what is missing is the transcendental dimension of the formless – which is where true love arises. Is that part of the personal love, or is the personal level all that there is? That determines whether that so-called “love” is going to turn into something painful eventually, and frustrating, or if there is a deepening. The important thing is that true love emanates from the timeless, non-formal dimension of who you are. Is that shining through the personal love that is to do with affinity of forms? If it is not, there is complete identification with form, and complete identification with form is ego. The key is to ask, “Is there space in this relationship?” Or are there only thoughts and emotions? We need to acknowledge that there are personal affinities. Love becomes a source of suffering when the transcendental is missing. How does the transcendent come in? By being spacious with the other. Which essentially means that you access the Stillness in yourself while you look at the other…..